Wednesday, 12 February 2014

Practically Single

When I say that I’m “practically single,” what I mean is, I’m single, and that’s practical.  Today is December 29, 2013, I’m 25, and I have yet to have had a single girlfriend.

This isn’t a topic that I usually bring up, as it’s for the most part a nonissue for me.  I know, I’m a weird one, not very much people can honestly tell you that they never been in a relationship and that they don’t really care whether they get one or not in the future.

It’s not that I’m avoiding girls or relationships.  It’s just that, at this point, I haven’t found any girls that wanted to start to date.

Perhaps it has to do with my strategy to get a girlfriend.  At work I hang out with a bunch of teenagers, who often make a habit of seeing someone attractive and working up the nerve to ask them out.  That’s not how I will roll.  My plan is to make friends with a girl, and if after becoming friends with her I can see that she’d be a good match for me, I’d ask her out.  Perhaps the extra time I wait will be used against me in the form of someone else asking her out first, but I figure it’s worth the risk.

A huge part of my whole single situation is that I trust that if God really wanted me to have a wife, I would end up with one.

If you were paying attention, you would realize I haven’t exactly done the greatest job of explaining of why it was practical to be single.

Keep in mind throughout this that I don’t think that there’s anything wrong with getting married.  It’s just that there’s a lot of parts to it that doesn’t exactly jive with my personality.

I'm a practical minded guy, and there’s a few things that many women like to do that aren’t exactly practical:

  • Go shopping just for fun (especially for shoes when they don’t need any more) 
  • Spend a great deal of money to get their hair or nails done 
  • Think with their emotions
  • Wear high heels

After marriage come babies.  Diaper wearing, hungry, mess making, screaming, crying, self-harming babies.

Yes, I do understand that there are a great deal of advantages of having a wife, and even a family.  However, this isn’t an article about that.  This is about the flipside, the practical side of living the bachelor life:

  • Not having to share the bathroom 
  • Not having to use a cup 
  • Having less dishes, garbage 
  • Easier to fill out paper work asking if you have dependents 
  • Having the whole bed to yourself without anyone snoring in the room

Upon hearing that I’ve never had and girlfriends, many people have the inclination to try to comfort me, saying along the lines of “don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll find someone who’s just right for you,” or “I know someone who was married quite a bit older than you.”  I have thick skin, I don’t let things bother me, but when people say this kind of thing, I always just say, “I’m not worried about it.”

Perhaps it’s because I’m single and thus my perspective is a bit tainted, but it seems to me that the general consensus is that a successful person gets married.  It’s just part of the flow that of how people expect a happy life to go.  Why is this? 

The bible says that the ability to stay single is a gift (1 Corinthians 7:7).  I believe I have this gift.

**The next part was added over a year after the initial posting**

I posted something on Facebook a while ago, and since it shows another way being single is practical, I decided to add it here:

"Last night I had a very brief conversation with friends of mine on the topic of relationships and "best friends." I have some really good friends, friends I can go to if I want to talk, amazing people. Yet, I do not think I at this point in my life have what you may call a "best friend." This Romeo doesn't have a Juliet. This Sherlock doesn't have a Watson (or, this Watson doesn't have a Sherlock... sometimes it's hard to be humble).

I came to realize that this in a way gives me a privilege that others don't have. When I want to wind down or vent, there's no default person that I turn to. This means time and time again I find myself turning to Jesus. I don't have a significant relationship to distract me from my relationship with Jesus. Truly, there is no greater friend available. He alone is able to consistently love me more than I could ever love.

So, other single people out there, don't miss out this awesome opportunity your singleness allows you: an opportunity to grow the relationship that matters most."