Friday, 4 October 2013

Not a Cowboy

(Created on July 11, 2010... and no I didn't have a girlfriend or wife, I was just taking poetic license in the song)

I'm currently living in Calgary, Alberta.  AKA "Cowtown."  The Calgary Stampede is underway, and the city is being swarmed by cowboys, cowboy-wanna-bes, and tourists.  Not surprisingly, the radio station currently being played at work is the country station.  Over and over again I am forced to listen to country songs.  Needless to say, the overall attitude of the country song writers don't nearly match mine.  Although the lyrics of these songs aren't nearly as terrible as the ones heard on the hitlist, they nonetheless annoy me.  This annoyance prompted me to write a country song.  I know it doesn't have the best rhymes, and I'd have to learn a musical instrument to work out the iambic pentameter (I'm not sure if that's actually makes sense, I just wanted to use that term because it sounds smart) and music to go with it, but this is what the song would generally be.

Well I ain't got no ranch
And ain't got no whiskey
No leather boots, no pickup truck,
A wide-brimmed hat just ain't for me!
You won't catch me in a bar,

Because....

Refrain:

I have a plan, have a woman, have a job
I don't need regret and pain
To do what I need to do
I may live in Cowtown, but
I don't wanna be a cowboy,
I wanna be a man

(End Refrain)

From across the room he was looking at her
All by herself, sitting in the corner.
To him she was just another pretty face
A seven, a girl worth playing,
Because he was a cowboy, not a man

(Refrain)

One more empty night killing zombies
Tomorrow he would sleep through work
On company time he would surf for babes
At home, claiming tiredness, he'd watch TV
Because he's not a man, not even a cowboy

(Refrain)

This guy I knew had all the toys
Even had a job, good friends, all the joys
He wore a cowboy hat, had a grin, and a beard
But he wanted things his way, he couldn't serve
Because he was a cowboy, not a man

(Refrain)

You're a cowboy sir?  Yee-freaking-haw!  I'm a man!


Yeah, I know my song ain't the greatest.  Which makes it the perfect country song, don't you think?  If you happen to accidentally steal this song and make some money out of it.... you owe me lunch.

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