Saturday, 5 October 2013

Locked Myself In Bathroom (Plus More Old Funny Stories)

July 23 - Nobody at work is going to let me forget this anyway, so I may as well share this embarrassing story with you.  At work the men’s washroom doorknob was broken.  However, all of the existing parts (as far as I knew) were sitting on the shelf across from the bathroom.  I knew the boss knew about it and it was eventually going to get fixed, however I had free time so I decided it “couldn’t hurt” to take a quick look at it.  After all, I didn’t want to make guys use the women’s washroom (I’ve done it, I admit it - when you gotta go you gotta go.  It’s awkward but somehow more pleasant in the women’s washroom).

I managed to fit together all of the pieces of the doorknob.  I gave the door knob a twist, and everything was working just fine, moving like it should.  Just to be safe, however, I decided to make sure the door locked properly.

The moment I shut the door I realized the flaw in my plan.  What if the doorknob isn’t fixed?  If that was the case, then I would be stuck inside the washroom.

Man, that would be terrible.  After all, I was the only supervisor on duty, and there was a group of people reliant on me for my coveted keys to take care of things such as fixing cashiers’ mistakes at the tills, or unlocking the back door so that people could throw away garbage.

I gave the door knob a twist and pulled.  The door didn’t open.  I had somehow locked myself inside the washroom.

Frantically I pulled out my phone.  I paged one of the courtesy clerks to the back room:  I couldn’t very well say over the intercom “to the men’s washroom.”  When I heard his approach I started banging on the door.  I’m surprise he didn’t drop to the door laughing when he heard my plight.

I was about to give him my set of keys to get into a room which contained a screwdriver, which would mean my freedom, when I realized I had somehow managed to lose my keys.  Just about the time I made this discovery, there was a call over the intercom, “supervisor key to till two please.”  To bad the supervisor was locked in the bathroom with no idea where his keys were.

I did what any sane supervisor would do in this situation, I panicked and phoned my boss to come and rescue me.

As the calls were repeated, the word eventually made its way up to the front that I was locked in the washroom.  I told them it would be five to ten minutes before someone would be there to help them.

With the aid of a courtesy clerk I managed to force my way out of the bathroom moments before the boss arrived.  I still had a problem however, I didn’t know where my keys were, so I borrowed a set.

A couple of hours later I found my keys inside my work-phone case.  I knew it couldn’t be a coincidence that I both locked myself in the washroom and lost my keys for the first time ever.  Somewhere in my desperation I had put my keys out of the way in my phone case as I retrieved the phone.

So next time a supervisor is taking a while to come aid you at a store, perhaps they are locked in the washroom.  Or perhaps you can just think of this story and be entertained while you wait.

August 20, 2012 - A couple days ago a bride was running around in Sobeys with her wedding dress, tiara, and high heels on.  Check that off the “things you’ll only see once” list.

March 5, 2012 - A while ago at Buy-Low Foods a furious customer came into the store.  She demanded to speak to a manager.  She then went on to complain that “this shampoo wrecked my hair!  It got my hair all sticky and I couldn’t get it out!”  She then went on and on demanding that we contact the manufacturers and tell them to stop producing the shampoo, since it was so horrible.  My boss didn’t tell her that she wasn’t holding shampoo, but sunscreen.

September 17, 2010 - This one time I got a letter in the mail telling me that my veterinarian license had been suspended because I took too long to pay my fees.  I'm not a vet, but somewhere out there there's a pet doctor practicing their job illegally.

August 22, 2010 - Today a customer asked a co-worker "these boxes said that the peaches are from B.C., but the flyer says they're Canadian grown?"

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